What does a demisexual pansexual mean?

Sexual orientations can be as different as we humans are. Asexual, pansexual or bisexual are just three of the many adjectives that describe different sexual inclinations. Another term that is being used more and more is demisexuality. What's behind it?

Demisexual: what is it?

Demisexuality means being yourself only feels sexually or physically attracted to a person if an emotional bond has already been established. However, this emotional bond does not always have to lead to sexual attraction. It is only the prerequisite for sexual desire to arise at all. People who are demisexual have no interest in casual acquaintances or one-night stands. And even if they did, they probably wouldn't orgasm. Demisexuality thus falls into the spectrum of asexuality. Love is greater than lust. Demisexual people also often refer to themselves as gray ace (German gray area). Incidentally, this form of sexuality has nothing to do with gender.

What is the difference between demisexual and asexual?

As already mentioned, demisexuality and asexuality belong together. Demisexuality is seen as a sub-category of asexuality, so to speak. For the simple reason that demisexual people often go through lengthy periods when they can do just fine without sex. Even so, demisexuality should not be confused with asexuality. Asexual people have no sexual feelings whatsoever, while demisexual people can certainly have a physical attraction to other people. By the way: All other sexually sensitive people - regardless of whether they are homosexual or heterosexual and Co. - are referred to as allosexual.

Do demisexual people only have sex in relationships?

A common misconception is that demisexual people only have sex when they are in a relationship. Because of course: In most cases, a relationship has a strong emotional bond with the partner. But that also works if you don't have a relationship.

Am i demisexual? These signs speak for it

Demisexuality is not a choice. Some people even do not notice that they are demisexual for years, but only when they deal more closely with this type of sexuality. Are you wondering if you are demisexual too? There are a few signs that you can use to identify demisexuality.

  • When you fall in love with someone, you don't think directly about sex and smooching.
  • Flirting and dating make you nervous.
  • Not sure if you like men or women.
  • You don't like to talk about sex.
  • You long for an emotional bond.
  • The most important things to you during sex are closeness and tenderness.
  • There's not much you can do with porn.
  • You find other things attractive than your friends.
  • You never understood crushes on stars.
  • It is difficult for you to judge whether a person is attractive to you.
  • Sex plays a subordinate role in your life.

Demisexuality: is there a test?

Is there a test that tells me if I am demisexual? Not directly. However, you can question your preferences based on the points mentioned above and you will quickly come to a result. You can also ask yourself the following questions to test whether you are demisexual:

  1. Do you feel drawn to strangers?
  2. Are there actors or other celebrities that you find sexually attractive?
  3. Have you ever had a one night stand?
  4. Do you care about sex in a relationship?
  5. Do you feel like having sex regularly?
  6. Do you find it difficult not to have sex for a long time?

Do you have all or the majority of the questions with you No answered? Then there is a lot to suggest that you are demisexual.

How does the partner search work as a demisexual person?

Did you discover that you are demisexual? Congratulations - because that is the biggest step. As long as you know what your sexual orientation is, almost nothing stands in the way of your happiness. You don't have to be afraid of dating, because demisexuality doesn't have to have a negative impact on it. In fact, far more people are demisexual than you might expect. When it comes to dating, however, you should still take a few tips to heart.

  • Be aware of your sexual orientation and communicate it directly when you get to know each other.
  • Stand by your principles.
  • Get to know people better - even if you don't feel any physical attraction or pleasure at first.
  • First build friendships in order to create an emotional bond and trust in the best case scenario. Maybe in the end love will come of this.

Demisexual: What About Online Dating?

Demisexuality and online dating don't work? This is another misconception. Of course, demisexual people do not have the same thoughts as allosexual people when they swipe left and right on Tinder, Bumble and Co. But that doesn't mean that demisexual people can't use dating apps. Rather, it's about HOW to use the dating apps. So you can write your sexual orientation directly in your bio. On the other hand, you cannot give potential dates a like based on their photo, but rather on the basis of their interests, musical taste or humor. In addition, you will already notice as you write whether your intentions match or not.

Would you like more love topics? What is true love actually? And what is meant by the term platonic love? How toxic is a symbiotic relationship? And what does polyamory mean?

Sources used:100mensch.de, praxisvita.de, zeit.de